This is a repost from one of my other blog called as 'My secret diary' . This post was written some time back.. somehow it seems apt for this lazy wintry night...

Dearest,

How many times would I murmur, deep inside, that I miss you? I so want to forget; to let go.. I delude myself that I have finally.. and yet, all I need is one single word from you.. and I am right back to the very same place.. and I so dont want to be there.. Why is it that every gesture of yours.. warms my heart.. why is it that I want you in my life..

I know for sure.. that I will be able to keep you happy.. I have been studying for it.. studying you.. seems like forever.. and yet I know.. I can never expect the same.. that you wont be there for me.. but my stupid heart doesnt mind... all it wants is you! Always...

All those days I waited for you in the canteen.. while you were busy flirting with others.. forgetting all about me.. or all the hours I waited in that station while you missed the bus to meet some girl who traveled in the next..... doesnt matter... Nothing ever matters when it comes to you!.. I would even cross seven seas... for you..

if you really wanted me..

if only.. you took me up for that!

The saddest part is that you know everything .. but you wont bother..

Sigh! I hate you for it.. and yet I cannot help myself loving you!

All you need is to just be.. to exist.. and I would love you forever more!