meena iyer
Finally i am in mood to rant about something.. this time its my job that i am going to rant about [:)]

A year back I was working for a process called windows xp.. wherein we had general home users from USA call to us...

#customer 1: *A chinese customer*

Me: thank you for calling microsoft windows XP technical support. My name is meena. May I have your first name and case no?

Cu: I donot have a case number. will my SSN do ?

Me: I m sorry sir, Did you talk to somebody before you got transfered to me?

Cu: Oh yeah! I talked to a guy with funny accent. I ddint get what he said.

Me: no problem sir. How may I assist you ?

Cu: I am glad I got you. You have a good accent. These bloody indians have worst accent. Whereever I call i get routed to indians. * and he is chinese with worst accent possible*

Me: I am an indian too. Would you like to talk to an american?

Cu: No no. you talk good I donot want to be trasferred.

Me: May I know what the issue is?

Cu: My computer died on me. wouldn't start. My ISP says contact microsoft.
* wondering what computer got to do with ISP!!! *

Me: May I know if the power is on?

Cu: yes it is.

Me: Do you get any error message?

Cu: It says page cannot be displayed.

*makes sense but computer died???? *

Me: Are you able to see your desktop?

Cu: Cant receive emails too! You microsoft suck! I am planning to move to Mac computer!

Me : I understand sir that you are having isssues with your computer.. I am here to help you out.. I assure you that I will be resolving your issue by end of this call

Cu: It is not me who is having issue. It is microsoft. you have to fix it somehow I cannot waste more time. Let it be fixed by evening.. Good day!

* phone disconnected*

Me: Are you here sir?

*dail tone.............*

I was wondering how i can fix *his* computer from India... besides i do not know what the issue was.. and i was wondering why he paid $35.00 and stayed online for like more than an hour only to hang up!!!!

Customer 2: Fluttery old lady

Me: same opening

Cu:(very slowly.. lyk old ladies can talk) Hi dear. I am hoping that you can help me. A very nice gentleman was talking to me earlier helping me out. He gave me a number. is that waht you want?

Me : Yes ma'am

Cu: Oh okay. Let me get my glasses please. Give me a moment

Me: Sure ma'am take your time.

In the back ground: * hello susan. How are you dear? I am talking to this very nice indian lady.. Can you beleive it they talk english! So nice too. Such queer accent though... very polite. Oh honey my computer is acting up again. Tom used to fiddle around it for me.. but since his divorce doesnt come here any longer.. saad affair isnt it? That bitch! broke his heart she did * all this while i am still on hold*

* phone disconnected*

I wonder why they waste my time and their own!!

Customer 3: A old man from down south

Me: same opening

Cu: howdy lady! I am hoping to find some help. My computer is acting up I cannot open my aol anymore.

Me : May I know if you can visit some other site?

Cu: (drawls in sexy southern accent) I sure... havent .. tried.. but i would like to do it if you tell me how to do it..

Me: please open your browser.

Cu: say whaaaa????!!! I am sorry but i am not computer literate....

Me: how do you access AOL ?

Cu: i click on the icon on my home page..

Me: Do you see the blue "e" icon on your desktop?

Cu: Where do i find the desktop?

Me: I am sorry, do you see a blue "e" on your home page?

Cu: Yes. certainly I do.

Me: please click on it

Cu: I did.

Me: what does it show?

Cu: page cannot be displayed.

Me: okay. please type in the address bar.

Cu: okay give me a moment. *spells it out slowly.. types wrong.. types everything back slowly by this time 45 min is over your ST gives you warning to wrap it fast*

Me: May I know whats happening?

cu: Gives me the same error.

Me: okay. May I know if you see lights on your router/modem ?

Cu: I will tell you if you tell me where to find that...

Me : It generally is around your computer. Its a smal rectangular box with 4 lights burning..

Cu: I certainly had it last week, however my grandson took it away last week. I thought its not important.

Me: Sir, you cannot connect to internet without it.

Cu: Dont try to con me. I certainly can!!!! I went to AOL page last week.

Me: May I know if it was before or after you gave away the modem?

Cu: I am an old man. My memory isnt what it is. You cannot expect me to remember thaat!!!


Me: I am sorry sir, but i am positive that you cannot go online without that box. You can contact AOL and get it verified!

Cu: I certainly will do that. And for $35.00 you have a very bad service. I thought my issue will be resolved for the amount i paid! Should have known! big sharks like you only screws ppl like us!!

* disconnected*

Phew!!! for a guy who doesnt knw what browser is and doesnt know that what modem is... i think he doesnt deserve technology.. not when he calls me a bad service [:x]

Ah well there are more.. to be continued some other day

Stay tuned for a lady who discusses her love life wid me n asks advices.. for a lady who asks me to get married soon.. her sallly married at 15 and for a lady and a man who gives me pointers in raising my sweety!!

And then new stories abt horrendous days in web hosting company :-)
1 Response
  1. --xh-- Says:

    :) do re-start the customer series again... itz too fun to read