Today am in mood of rambling nothings. I have nothing to say.. for months i have been intensely blogging and now.. my brains need rest.. I havent written poetry for ages.. am not in the mindset of the same too.. somehow i feel I am cold inside... and I have got cold *yeah running nose and works*

So let me tell you something about how I spent my week without internet.. more so without orkut which has been my crutch for soo long now! well it feels liberated.. I suddenly found that i have soo much time on me.. also that i feel less desolate about life..

I also find that i dont feel as close to people as i assumed i am. Ofcourse i miss chatting with ppl but i feel no need to come online and chat with ppl. Well there have been avenues where i am not yet very successful viz sleep. May b i shud take sleeping pills and all... but i wud rather not.. am sure it will work out itself...

This weekend i went out.. met friends... bough 6 books read most of them :D :D

most of them is women centric books.. And you know what? I enjoy such books... may be i am too much of a feminist.. and why the hell not ? am the woman am i not ?

I dont feel being a woman means I should prove guys that i can be better than them,... hell why shud we be ? after all we r girls... we r feminine.. why bother ???

I wonder why being a boy like is soo grand...

A guy would make faces and say.. thats soo girlish or so like a girl.. blah blah blah.... why cant u b like guys... i would like to answer.. we r like girls thats y we r grls... if we wanted to be like guys.. we might better change our sexuality and be guys!

Now about books...

I read

1) 1 night@ call centre

Many people said its a nice book.. but i wont read it.. and now that I have read.. i cant stop saing how good the book is...

The way the author has interwoven the threads of life of 6 people to make a stunning tapestry is worth reading... my words would be never enough.. one has to feel through the whole potrayal...

Shyam: brilliant but with huge inferiority complex
Varun : Big ideas but confused and directionless
Priyanka: a typical indian girl torn between her independance and expectations of the family
Radhika: a foolish loving wife.. or lets just say too naive too trusting
Isha: Huge dreams and ambition to make it true
Milatary uncle: The middle aged displaced soul

how one eventful night irrevocably change their life.. when they decide to take control of their life and decide to change it themselves.

2) Olivia : Not anything really special.. run of the mill stuff actually ... and yet so different...

In this story there are 2 important characters. Our heroine with gray shades.. olivia and her younger sister belinda.

Olivia is sensible loving responsible and ace student. pliable and caring.. she should be apple of everyone' eye.. however it is not so. Belinda the ravishing baby doll like beauty with her selfish vanity is everyones favorite.. Olivia wonders why.. Belinda does alll the mistakes... she sleeps around.. give birth to a premature illegitimate dead child... gets expelled from colleges.. never works.. does nothing to deserve the love and care she gets.. No one ever blames her... she is forgiven always.. Olivia has to clear her mess always... even after her parents die... she takes care of her lil siss... if that isnt enough... the guy she loves since schoool days is more inclined to ahve sex with her younger sister than being close to her.. this is am amazing ptrayal of jealousy envy and love.. yes tqwisted in itself such complex feelings can be seen between bothers and between sisters... they can be very cruel to each other.. but when olivia goes for a date... trust belinda to come forward to help her look smart by doing her makeup...

For anyone who would like to have some inkling into a woman's personality must read this book...

3) Hanna's daughters

Now this is an other gem i really really loved and I would recommend everyone to read...

It spans for 3 generation of swedish family living on the border of Norway.. in a small village
It has 3 principal characters hanna her daughter Johanna and her daughter anna

Over years how these people lived.. their trials n tribulations.. their relations.. I loved this book more so coz i can understand the authoresses need to know more about her roots.. I feel the same too.. my mom's dead.. but there is this ache inside me that wants to know my mom better.. i hardly know anything abt her.. and to know more.. i wouldn't know where to start.. however lemme give you glimpse of this book

Hanna...

Proud, reticent, quiet sturdy and amazingly strong! raped at 12.. giving birth at 13.... lived in shame for 4 years until she married at 17 to a very older man who was given to moods and poetry.. uneducated and from poor background.. she could never ever be comfortable with him fully.. but she gave him sons.. 3 sons and 1 daughter she was proud of.... Daughter .. Joannna.. named for her dead elder sibling... husbands daughter from the first marriage.. we cant say how happy the marriage was.. but it sure was a content marriage.. a quiet happiness... no rush of madness....

Joanna..

Strong, opinionated , spirited and yet tender and warm..

An independant woman.. intelligent and with amazing sense of humour...

Anna

The third generation of woman.. with same attributes.. of strength resilience and independance.. and yet she lived with a womanizer and forgive him his follies.. while killing herself within..

This book is Anna 's journey towards maturity.. towards understanding herself.. and her family.. understanding woman who shaped her and yet whom she never gave time of her day.. ashamed of her mother and her grandmothers uncouth ways... hurt by rejection of her grandmother.. she had many issues to resolve.. a war child wid vivid memories of unresolved questions.. she was used to escaping within herself.. esp when she lost her child.....

there isnt much embellishment in this story.. its an travellgoue of road of life.. full of struggle and yet many lil joy.. its a story of rediscovery of a woman .. a redefination of sense of self....

it sure is amazing!