Figure this.. I trust on this company's service so much so that I already paid the money and waited for the Internet connection. By rule I should get it by 2 days.. however I didnt for 10 days. Finally I had to cancel my subscription and get it from a different company...

If that was not all, my antivirus expired and it won't let me delete it. For "Self protection mode" was turned on.. Even the removal tool from their website won't help! Somehow I managed to uninstall it however, it screwed my computer completely and I had to reinstall the OS.

So even after I did have internet.. I never got to use it properly.. Finally one fine day I decided to reinstall the OS.. with a brand new CD and guess what? The Cd worked half the way and then everything went haywire.. After trying 3-4 diff installation CD I concluded that the issue is with the CD drive... So I took it to a technician..

This technician took me for a fool and wouldnt listen to what I said was the issue.. As it happens he did listen but dint process it. I had clearly asked them to check the CD drive and went to do some shopping in the meantime. 20 min later when I return.. installation is going on.. And guess what ?

He installed it in the drive where data was stored. But ofcourse.. data was lost.. and what more.. he did it by connecting his CD drive to my computer.. And when I asked if he checked mine.. he said no.. He thought the issue was that the installation was not going through.. *$%^&&^*&@& *

Finally he brought in a senior technician.. who checked and said my drive has no issue.. must be the CD.. My guess is that it was that the 'bus' was loose or something.. and removing and putting it back again helped me.. Somehow hardware issues scare me and I never fiddle with my comp's hardware!

Anyhow.. installation was done.. and things seemed fine... When I came home.. everything worked... but the sound card.. now that has an issue.. The driver doesnt seem to work.. I now have to remove the card n put it back up and check if that works.. That is a work for days when I have lotsa patience.. so for now.. I am.. erm my computer is soundless :((

Whoosh.. if that wasn't enough! Yesterday afternoon.. our gas cylinder ran empty.. ( no we still don't have gas connections!) It wasn't a big thing.. we had microwave and the food was already cooked.. only had to make coffee and reheat the food.. Well the gas ppl are nice.. you call them in the morning.. you get the cylinder by 1 p.m or so.. So things didnt seem bad.. but ofcourse I couldnt guess what was in store for me.. erm us!

In the morning.. my sister joined the same gym that I go to.. first of all the trainer gave her a detailed complaint about how I dont seem to work hard ( PBBBHHTTT!!!!)

This was coz I missed 2 days.. (cousin's marriage :( ) And now I have gained 2 kgs back! burrrr!!!
And instead of encouraging me.. he has become vitriolic! how rude!
And then ofcourse the insecurity I feel whenever my sis is around! I mean she is this 'perfect' being.. everyone seems to want to be with her.. like her the first moment they set their eyes on her.. even though she doesnt do anything to get that attention.. or even wants such attention ( and that makes it even more harder for me to be not envious) *sigh*

So I said some really stupid stuff.. she said some reaally stupid stuff.. only saving grace is that I apologized and even accepted that I am envious of her.. and would have rather loved if she visited some other gym.. And the day went through the drains from there..

When I called the gas ppl they said the cylinder cannot come before 6 pm.. which happens sometimes and I wasnt really too worried about it.. its still a good time..
Its my usual practice to sit online right after I come home.. coz I am too tired to work initially and I dont wanna lie down.. for invariably I would sleep...
Today.. the net was down.. I called the tech supp.. I got an IVR.. I never get any IVR.. so that meant they were not in office.. after all its a local cable internet.. not any big hotshot company..

And this IVR wanted me to press keys to choose options.. Now my mobile has one issue.. not exactly an issue.. but I have not figured out how to press keys and send to the IVR from my mobile.. hence I never call Customer care from my mobile.. I searched for my sister's mobile to call.. The battery was down.. the moment I fixed it to the charger and turned it on.. for it had s\wed off as the battery was down and all.. the power went..

I thought everyone's power went... and so went to sleep.. Woke up by 3 for someone was at the door.. That again is one bigggg story better left unsaid.. So I realized.. everyone else has power.. its only us who don't.. But ofcourse we have to call the electrician.. but before that we need to clean up the house.. for sweety left alone had made a mess ofcourse! Finally after cleaning the house.. getting a take out from local deli and having a makeshift lunch.. we decided to find the electrician..

Now.. there is a parellel thread in this story... Before we shifted some 20 days ago to this new house we had given our sofa to the local carpenter to change the cloth and for a lil refitting of foam inside the sofa and all.. he had promised to send it by 1 week... 5 days down the line he said he has to go sabrimala for darshan and cannot give it by 1 week however will do the same by 2 weeks or so. Seeing that we have no choice now that the work was half way done.. we agreed with admonitions that there should be no further delay.. he profusely agreed

We received the sofa today.. 4 weeks later.. *sigh* His excuse was that he is ill.. and in the meantime he didnt receive our calls nor informed us in anyway!! So he was supposed to come today in the morning by 11.. he didn't come ofcourse.. by 5 pm.. when I went to the local electrician's shop.. he wasn't around too.. infact the shop was not open at all..

Finally by 6 pm everyone started arriving one behind other.. yes and within 30 min.. I had gas.. sofa and electricity! And all through the day I made countless phone calls and went personally to get things fixed.. but that didn't happen!

I tell you.. this makes me believe firmly in "RAahu kaal" ;) I got to ask if it was raahu kaal today :P :P

Okay not really.. its like I had to wait for time to be right ..

Phew! Ranting it out makes me feel better :D

I dont mean it literally.. but in effect that is what I did today.. there are two major festering wounds in my life.. namely the two guys in my life...

One is a very old friend.. I have been holding a flame for him since I dont know when.. though I haven't told him in as many words.. he always knew my feelings.. which obviously wasnt reciprocated... And yet he kept drifting from one relation to other.. each worser than the last.. and yet never gave me a chance to show how "good" I am for him..

So today finally I put my words into and email and sent it to him.. And I feel great about it.. esp the part where I say...

It might seem arrogant.. but if you ignore my looks and my fatness... you will find that I am much better person than these "wusseys" you seem to find "perfect" for you

I have pined and pined.. hoping you will really find one day how I am perfect for you! I now know you never will

Juts do me a favor and find someone to whom I can graciously lose in competition and not to pitiful creatures who dont know what they want in life and have no spine to follow their decisions nor their love!

I have had enough finally! I really have.. I propbably should have told you before.. but I havent.. but now I will..

He he he! Feels terrific! I have been thinking this and holding on for him for so long that it has become an habit for him as well as me.. it got to shake him and decide if he really wants me or not.. if not.. its time to say good bye! bah!


And also the only relationship that I had in my life.. Amit.. I think its time for me to let go.. to forgive him for what he did.. and myself too...

He was like that hidden wound in my heart tha festered in some corner.. occasionally I would poke it hard.. find that its still tender and let it be.. But finally I have decided that its about time I let the sun fall on the wound and let it heal.. for my poking will never heal it.. if anything infest it more..

So I finally forced myself all evening to read through all our chat sessions on gtalk.. The sessions after the break up to be specific.. for that was the most vitrolic areas.. full of hurts.. and harsh words.. both his and mine..

I guess I needed to read this.. for I realized that the conversations were not as bad as I thought they were.. we even flirted lightly.. laughed even teased each other.. ofcourse there were tense moments.. but there were also moments of concern.. I guess thats what healed me..

There were moments wherein I wanted to hit a reply and say.. you know what.. that time.. I was impatient with you and so were you trying hard to save our relationship.. for anything to have worked out... And now I would love to be your friend.. I could have been kinder.. softer and more patient with you.. I wasnt.. My desicion was right.. Even he has to agree.. and yet.. it could have helped if I was a bit more gentler.. I was hurting so were you Amit! *sigh*

I would love to be friends now.. but I guess it makes no sense to wake up the sleeping dogs.. Anyhow.. I have forgivebn.. and am on my way to forget it :)

Most importantly.. Am healing finally :)

Many months back, almost like 1 and 1/2 years back, I met a very curious and amazingly sarcastic and witty kid of 16.. Back then I didnt know he was so young.. and yet.. we had so much fun chatting on yahoo and gtalk and ofcourse orkut.. The hallmark of our chats was use of "Tamil" A language we both are not really very fluent in... Oh yeah and his name is Akshay.. And here are his some of the most funny pronouncements.. you can also read it in his scrap book!

## Be careful before being the first person to do something that is easy, there is a reason you are the first.

The best thing about losing weight is seeing your drab clothes go loose on your body frame! I mean really.. its like waking from a nightmare and being welcomed in the paradise of good clothes :D Wish I could say the same about my shoes.. am still size 10 :(

P.S: My trainers still don't seem happy with my efforts! Damn! I am trying my level best! And I am losing weight! What more they want??? Actually I know! They won't be happy until I do diet.. and I am not gonna follow any diet that I can't continue all my life.. and the pace at which I am losing is just fine.. bah!

Yesterday I had a gory dream.. not a nightmare as such.. but well a dream I would rather not watch.. As it happens, I was creating a story in collaboration with a friend.. will be posted soon enough..

And I guess that stuck in my sub conscious mind somewhere.. for as I said it was gory dream..

So the dreams goes like this.. I am the audience.. more like watching those silly cheap psycho thrillers.. like SAW .. I have seen SAW I to IV... Umm

So in this movie kinda dream.. there are 3 characters.. it is silly and disjoint.. dont look for logic..

It starts with 2 guys n a girl.. Lets say X and Z are guys and Y is a girl..

So when the dream starts, X and Z are fighting as in whose partner Y would be.. while she sits calmly.. she seems like a little dumb witted..

Somehow then it seems to turn as 'SAW like game show' where in only one person will be alive.. and that person wins something..


in the next scene.. for it seemed like that... It is night.. definitely twilight atleast.. and X and Y are on the tree and Z is trying to climb.. however X n Y dont let him climb.. there is a hungry wolf following them all.. and X wants the wolf to kill Y and let them be..

However, weirdly.. having pity of Z.. Y gives him two glass bangles as weapons.. for that was the only thing they all had as weapon..

Z tries to hit the wolf with the glass bangle and fails miserably! And Then the camera pans at Y she cant see the way the fight is going and is crying uncontrollably.. while X tries his level best to not see as well as console her..

Then its morning... X tries to see if he can see the wolf or Z's body somewhere.. but its not there.. finally they decide to come down to see what to do next.. as soon as X comes down.. the wolf appears and kills him.. and this part was very gory! and yucky! I woke up because of this :| :|

I wudnt have described such a stupid dream.. however, i found this thread in orkut.. and got inspired..

Guys try and interpret my dream.. what do you think this could mean ? I have posted it in that thread too.. I will keep posting their replies here :) Meanwhile rack your brains for the answer :D

Ah my sister says my poems seem very mature and polished.. but my short stories need a lot more polishing :) Ah the first ever spontaneous comment on my writing! Feels great!

Did I ever tell you how I bludgeon my sister to read my works?

A really silly thought came to my mind today...

As it happens, everyday when I come home, I have to heat up the milk. Though it is my sister's set of chores.. she is so nicely asleep that I cannot wake her up.. I do try though.. for you see am so lazy.. and working out does leave me tired.. And all I ever want to do at such time is sleep..

Anyhow, since sleeping that early is not an option.. I need my coffee.. so I make it.. however, I tend to keep the milk in slow flame and sit in front of computer or TV.. And obviously loose the track of time.. and hence, Its been 3 days consecutively , I have been over boiling the milk.. And while I was cleaning the gas stove I remembered early days when my mom spilt the milk.. Dad would always get angry.. He held the superstition that spilling means one's prosperity will go..

While mom maintained that it is an offering to fire god how can that be inauspicious! After all we willfully let the milk boil when we go to a new house .. as an offering and in Pongal...

Anyways.. so I was wondering if any of you knew of any superstition that contradict each other?

Like apparently my dads and mom's did ?

If you guys remember few days back in one of the previous post, I had mentioned about a guy who had issues with using front page ? So this guy came back again for one more change.. And I was firm this time saying I can't help.. and yet when he persisted.. I felt yet again it was easier to do than ask him to leave.. So I made the change for him.. and in return he writes..

Dear *****,

Thank you so much. Remember, you are always welcome to visit and see the beautiful coast of Oregon, USA. Want to learn to surf? I can show you.
--
Best regards,

***

I mean what am I to reply to that and yet be professionally formal ? Its not like outsourcing is recent phenomenon.. its been at least 10 years now for sure! And also, its not like the customers don't know that we are in India. We dont lie.. and yet why do they have to write us emails that puts us in a dicey position ?

Burrrr..............!!!!