meena iyer
Yeah so are new year resolutions.. self analysis.. lets say taking stock of your life is in vogue
And being most commonest of all beings I feel the same

With out much ado I would start with it.
this year was one of the eventful year. not the most eventful that happens to be 2005..

So this year saw my maiden inning in game of relationships or whatever. It was a huge disaster But not in vain.... I learned a lot from it.


---> Love myself
---> Hasty decision sucks.
---> Do not trust blindly. The person should be worth of ur trust.
---> Stop being a victim..



Really! I never thought anyone can love me as I am and yet I wanted someone to love me.. to find the diamond hidden in coal.. Firstly I thought myself to be diamond but I refused to shine... Does it make sense?


So resolution 1) If I really want quality ppl in my life I have to b of better quality myself namely.. Shed weight. Take care to look good.


Resolution 2) Be choosy of my friends.. I generally am a friend to ppl there are hardly any people who are my close friends .. online... Thats gonna change.. I am not going to b someone who would give never expect.. coz expectations r there.. hidden ones ones that chokes one inside so that soon you lose interest in the relation

Resolution 3) Reduce orkutting..
Waste of time..When you redirect your energy to unneccessary things like this you forget what is important in your life..


Resolution 4) priortize. I need to b clear about what I need in life... Its about time I take control.. drifting like a leaf in the water is not my idea


Resolution 5) Be aware of your surrounding! I have lost touch with reality thats what has happened! I hardly know anything that happens in world.. this apathy refuses to shock me : :

Resolution 6) Make all the documents like election card passport et al

We dont know when oppurtunity will strike us.. better be ready for it

Resolution 7) Relationships are not start n end of life.. focus on my career.. or rather make one! : :

After one disastrous relationship online *fool me* I was almost in brink of other.. which somehow dint happen as reason reigned.. but stewpid me went head along with an brief affair of 3-4 weeks : : I know crazily insane.. Again reason came to rescue thankfully before I did much damage..

SO in CAPITALS!! OFF GUYS OFF GUYS!! doesnt mean I will end up going around wid a gal [;)]

Resolution 8) Take responsibility! Yeah I hate that always.. I always dream of running away wherein I am not responsible for anybody else than me which is freaky! I am gonna take conscious effort to take responsibilty and do it to best of my ability!

Resolution 9) stop blaming others circumstances etc etc.. Really! Unbeknownst to me or rather without realizing.. thats what I was doing big time! It would stop

The best part of this year would be return of my ability to write poems! I am reveling in it big time.. n I hope to continue with it!!

Resolution 10) Be prepared for your interviews... Its better to read n learn than go blank n perform dismally! I never knew i have learning problems!!

Cant even start with how the life played games with me.. wid dad in hospital for sometime .. then him getting lost etc etc...

Resolution 11) Spread your legs as far as your bedsheet is.. meaning.. never commit to help when its gonna create problems with you!!

Resolution 12) Read more books

Resolution 13) Do not volunteer for everything choose your cause n be faithful to it!

Resolution 14) Expect less from people and you wont be much disappointed!

Resolution 15) Time management! I need it!
meena iyer
I recently realized how ironic my life is :)

Recently, I visited one interview......

Which made m realized how much i am forgetting.. *lots*

Okay to start wid...

When we first came to bangalore, I never dreamt of joining a call centre *such work were beneath me*

LOL! if only i knew my future...

I used to accompany my sister for interviews for both support and company.. we were 2 girls in strange city with no experience... when no calls from IT industry came, I decided to try my luck here.. u see i was getting frustrated being home all the time...

I was so confident that I will get in... Thats when I got a rude awakening.. I was rejected for my accent which was absurd :

however, I did get through in my 3rd interview and for a pretty good process..

The days were same borin repitation and i wasnt satisfied... after quiting job and 3 months wid no job offer.. I decided to try back in the industry where i performed really well

*many appreciation emails and compliments wherein customers thought i was american.. etc etc * I was sure i will get through
I did too in all the rounds but HR... where they found me over qualified for the job....

after rejection in 5 companies for being over qualified, I got through this company.. been here for an year now.. looking to move on..

So.. few weeks back I gave one interview..

and I was offered an alternative job coz.. i am not qualified enough.. which I agree to given my dismal performance..

but still life brought me back to same juncture...

earlier i wasnt qualified enuf.. then i was over qualified now back to under qualified!

*phew*
meena iyer
Words in themselves are nothing
but when backed by feelings.. they r everything

And yet for many a years these words were elusive to me
And i was pensive
wanting to know
when will they flow

Now i love the way them vocabulary comes creeping unawares
liked flummoxed and caliver

ha ha ha!

I would just b thinking something ... and some nice word would pop up.. i dunno if u can relate to it or u\s its more like i taste the word with a sentence and love it...

Every new word that i remember gives me special pleasure..

once upon a time used to boast of a very high vocab..


not that its really bad now.. but worser than what it was surely..

I still like how i feel when i remember them words...

its like discovering oneself...


am i making sense?
meena iyer
Cant believe my grammar in the earlier post!

It sux bigtime!
meena iyer
Yeah! I want to talk about our puppy love err love of dog. Most of us who buy dogs as pet for the first time.. do that without thinking anything without planning.

This causes both you and your dog to suffer. Like I have suffered in many ways!

Most of the dogs brought are left out as strays when they grow up as the owner bought it when it was a small puppy all cute and all but the grown up is hard to handle.

From experience loving dogs is one thing and keeping one is another thing ball game!

If you cant provide time for your dog.. cant take care in general.. kindly do not buy one!

Firstly, its better to potty train as soon as possible.
Please read some book on dog care before you buy one so that You know what to expect
Do not skip any vaccine. Its best if you take the dog for monthly check up.
Its better to train the dog through professionals if you do not have time
Please follow all that the trainer says. Do not spoil the dog
Take it out atleast 2 times a day for 30 min


Now about my personal experience! I always loved dogs. So I blindly got one.. without much thought... My sweety is one the best gift in my life.. yes and yet I face a lot of problem.

I didnt potty train it. So till date she shits shabbily. What i mean is.. intially she used to shit when I used to take her out. if by chance i cudnt.. she would shit in the hall. Believe me.. cleaning that often pisses you.

By nature i am lazy.. and.. well i do not play as much as i shud wid a dog... so well she gets bored.. though its not a problem now.. but earlier sweety used to chew so many things.. pillows.. bed... jeans.. belts.. slippers.. bags.. anything plastic or wooden or rubber...

my sis n dad r pissed by it in parts.. we all love her a lot.. shes the pearl of our eyes.. yet its hard to control her.. shes only afraid of me n listens to me!

Dads old.. n she tries to jump on him like she does with us. Our doggy is not trained much. So well she is obedient ofcourse.. but very excited. And she is bored a lil. I try to give time.. but my life is hectic already..

I do not regret having sweety in my life.. but i regret not taking care to b informed....
meena iyer
This was one question I promised I wud never ask myself.. and I never have until now.... Today I am sexed up... the chill the beauty everything makes me want somebody's warm body by myside... engulfing in love.. and yeah making love to me in many ways described in them mills n boons novel.. with his eyes.. with his touch well u get the picture


Since the start its been my way to express my mood though my orkut profile.. and yet today I removed some of it.. edited it to make it publically palatable...

What changed? how did i end up thinking abt what others think?

In other ways too.. i never cared if ppl dint read my blog or commented.. nowadays i do..

I want ppl to read my poems praise me.. ah vanity and well desperation.. i am desperate more n more nowadays!

Phew!
meena iyer
Yesterday was my dad's birthday.. 73rd one.. He is now 72 years old going on 73!

I know i shud b happy and all.. but somehow his imminent mortality has come around to mock my face :(

He is no longer as vital as involved as he was.. He needs help getting up.. walking... he sleeps almost all day.. most of the time he wont reply to what u say unless u repeat a lot of time..

The shadow of the man that was haunts us!

I mean it reminds us he is no longer getting old.. sooner or later .. whether we r ready or not.. whether we like it or not.. the day would come when we wud b comepletely orphaned..

I am just too morbid to write anything more.. I hope we fill him with joy n contentment while he is with us..

Somehow each lil gesture each lil joy has become significant nowadays.

I never knew i had such infinite measures of patience in me.. i am glad i do :)


Phew!

somehow words n thoughts both are very unresolved nowadays for posting blogs.. my restlessness and ambiguity shows.. isnt it?
meena iyer
I am kinda shocked by the way ppl take marraiges nowadays.. very casual : :

Let me give you some examples that made me think about it...

There is this cousin of mine lets say X . Ek lauti sis fo 2 well earning broes.. bahut laad pyaar se rkha dono ne.. then ek din bhabhi aaayi.. bhaiyya ka dhyan pisla.. aur behen felt left out..
So behen who is of my age.. wanted to marry to have someone give her same attention as her bro gives hsi wife..

Jaldi mein marraige fix kiya.. pehle hi ladke ko haan kehdi.. dint even finish her studies engage ho gayi...

3 months down the line wants divorce ::

If she had taken time to get to know him better may b she neednt go thru this ordeal..

her bro now doesnt wanna support her.. he is happy in his life and well the other one n dad they dont liek what she is doing..

indeed i dont like it.. but i feel she still did the best thing possible

however where was the foresight??


Then again there is this other cousin of mine who married when she was 21 .
A girl from poor family.. she had recently got a job.. we all wanted her to stick to the job.. support her family atleast for 2-3 years.. until her bro finishes his studies...

but family mein sabko jaldi thi.. again married to first available boy.. who is now a good for nothing ninny boy!

Atleast they are in love wid each other.. thats the only saving grace.. warna after marraige 2 kids down the line they r wanting for money..

my heart say wheres ur brains ur foresight?
why dint u wait for a better man.. or for making means for urself?
if marraguie was needed why kids so early
why 2 kids back to bac?
Le sigh!

i think thats it for today
meena iyer




Simply me :-)





Me in a freaky mode, sister smiling, kamal and piyush :-)








Flowerly love! Wonderful photography isnt it ???







M- mountain yay!!!














Me sliding down to avoid walking :P :P








Amit, Piyush Kamal sister and me.. on the crypt :-)











Sister, amit, me , tojo, and sid :-) on the trail while energy was still there!!














meena iyer
Have you ever trusted someone from deep within your heart.. loved them like no other person only to find out that they dont respect you?

Only to find out that they think you are a cheapo... you are selfish.. that you hinder their growth.. that u r jealous of their happiness??

Have you ever been so blind as to push their happiness in front of yours.. grudged every happiness that you got coz they r suffering?..

Have you been left behind in their happiness but you always shared yours?

Even lil things like accessories.. you would want them to choose the best and thenn you would take the rest.. and yet even after drawing double their salary you would settle for worst.. and then b slapped wid a accusation that you show off your pay.. have you ever faced that ?

Are you tired of their endless dreaming wherein your choices your needs r never considered?
Have you been said that your choice in books r waste of time when they hardly touch what they buy and u r a voracious reader?

Have you been soffocated every day so much that yiou wish to run away and yet your sense of obligation.. sense of duty ties you down?

Have you ever rejected your dream job coz it wouldnt fit in their greater plans?

have you?

And yet be blamed that you dont like them to be happy?

I have! I wish i was never born.. I wish i was dead! I am so tired of this plastic smile... I am tired!
meena iyer
These are not the pics that we clicked.. will add that later :)

Few facts:
-----------
It is 60 km from bangalore.
No specific monuments to visit
There is a temple on the top
No water or food available ( buttermilk is available)

We were a group of 14 ppl. We left Bangalore around 6:45 am, reached the bottom of the hill by 8:00 am.. reached the top around 11:15 or something.. awesome views... monkeys are there.. loads of rocks.. after having breakfast we started alighting.. this path is very steep ** very scary for me ** reached the bus by 1:15 pm

Phew.. now the fun stuff.. trekking after 2 years made me realize how out of shape i am.. I have trekked mountains bigger than this and still never felt so tired! its abt time i shape up huh!

Every 5 min i stopped.. i wondered if i cud make it.. i am glad that i did and then made so many new friends.. it was an awesome trip.. i hope everyone enjoyed it as much as i did..

hoping to go to many more such trips!